[Pssst! Hold onto your sandals! Special Rivendell promo for readers of this blog, click on their new ad over there in the right hand margin!]
It's snowy and cold outside and the riding totally blows, but I am super duper psyched and stoked and pumped about the new Specialized Super Expert Evo Crux Crux Evo Crux Red Di2 Super Disc Expert Evo!
As the popularity of gravel racing increases, so too does the number of companies introducing gravel road bikes or, as is the case with Specialized, creating gravel versions of an existing cyclocross bike. The latest gravel-centric bike from Specialized is the US$7,000 CruX Expert EVO Di2 (UK pricing and availability TBA.)
That's right, for only $7,000, the company that loves to sue the fuck out of people for no reason has managed to deliver a bicycle that can be ridden on gravel surfaces, which were heretofore totally un-navigable by bicycle.
So what makes this cyclocross bike not a cyclocross bike but a gravel-specific bike? Well, it has one more set of water bottle bosses than a cyclocross bike (or it has three more if your cyclocross bike is so cool that it doesn't have any):
The new CruX Expert EVO Di2 builds on the general concept of a gravel racer through the addition of a third set of water bottle bosses underneath the downtube and a build kit focused on longer rides over roads less traveled.
Oh, and it also has a gravel-specific build kit, which means basically this thing:
And also also, it was designed with input from the successful gravel racer who says that cyclocross bikes and gravel bikes are basically the same thing:
In other words, we've reached a point in the over-refinement of the bicycle at which the only discernible difference between them is the amount of tiny holes they have in their frames--so basically, choosing a bicycle is now like sexing a kitten.
By the way, that little plastic gas canister hutch is called the "SWAT," so expect Specialized to start suing law enforcement agencies all over the country:
As well as various manufacturers of analog household pest control devices:
(The makers of this S-Works Roubaix Fly Swatter are in big, big trouble.)
And now, I'm pleased to present you with a quiz. As always, STUDY the item, THINK, and then CLICK on your answer. (But don't forget to TURN OFF THE CAPS LOCK.) If you're right you'll know, and if you're wrong you'll see a cyclist hitting a badger.
Thanks very much for reading, ride safe, and bunny-hop those badgers.
--Wildcat Rock Machine
1) Fill In The Blank:
"This past week the region was buffeted by Winter Storm _____."
--Janus
--Janice
--Anus
--Scranus
(You'd think it would be the doping, but you'd be wrong.)
2) Professional cycling isn't more popular in the United States because Americans are very uncomfortable with:
--Bicycles
--Guttural tongues
--Men sensually rubbing other men to gentle flute accompaniment
--All of the above
(Danilo Di Luca after a post-race massage.)
3) Banned cyclist Danilo Di Luca says which percentage of riders in the Giro D'Italia were doping?
--10%
--90%
--100%
--110%
(Hey, he's walking here.)
4) New York City Mayor Bill Di Blasio set his long-awaited "Vision Zero" program in motion with a:
--Lavish ceremony featuring guest speaker David Byrne, who does not own a car
--Push in Albany for congestion pricing
--Commitment to lower the citywide speed limit to 20mph
--Pedestrian ticket blitz and beatdown
(Fugu too, Assos.)
5) How much for these Assos "fuguSocks?"
--$16.95
--$26.95
--$43.95
--$61.95
(Paul Budnitz: the real-life Karl Farbman.)
6) Old Man Budnitz is hawking a fat bike now.
--True
--False
7) Robs Fords's transition from politics to stand-up comedy appears to be right on track.
--True
--False
***Special You-Know-You-Want-This-Jan-Ullrich-Lego-Set-Themed Video***
